Get Your Chuck Norris On...

Discussion in 'General Talk' started by moosemeat, Jan 19, 2013.

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  1. moosemeat

    moosemeat Pandora's Woodland Beast

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    Chuck Norris doesn't use watches or clocks, HE decides what time it is...
     
    #21 moosemeat, Jan 21, 2013
  2. Wolfs Bane

    Wolfs Bane New Member

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    Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
     
    #22 Wolfs Bane, Jan 22, 2013
  3. aFunnyFatGuy

    aFunnyFatGuy Badass with a Badassitude

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    Chuck Norris doesn't age. He levels up
     
    #23 aFunnyFatGuy, Jan 22, 2013
  4. FPSPearce

    FPSPearce PyroPearce the Invincable

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    the reason there is over population in china is because chuck norris went there for a Karate tournament and every woman in 10 square miles was instantly impregnated
     
    #24 FPSPearce, Jan 22, 2013
  5. aFunnyFatGuy

    aFunnyFatGuy Badass with a Badassitude

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    They once had a showing of Walker Texas Ranger in 3D. There were no survivors
     
    #25 aFunnyFatGuy, Jan 22, 2013
  6. moosemeat

    moosemeat Pandora's Woodland Beast

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    Chuck Norris can win American Idol....using sign language....
     
    #26 moosemeat, Jan 22, 2013
  7. Alien FireFly

    Alien FireFly Alien Overlord V.I.P

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    They once made Chuck Norris toilet paper but Chuck Norris dont take shit from no one.
     
    #27 Alien FireFly, Jan 22, 2013
  8. Stevethebandit09

    Stevethebandit09 New Member

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    In russia chuck norris still kicks your ass
     
    #28 Stevethebandit09, Jan 22, 2013
  9. moosemeat

    moosemeat Pandora's Woodland Beast

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    Chuck Norris counted to infinity...twice...
     
    #29 moosemeat, Jan 22, 2013
  10. Wolfs Bane

    Wolfs Bane New Member

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    Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
     
    #30 Wolfs Bane, Jan 22, 2013
  11. aFunnyFatGuy

    aFunnyFatGuy Badass with a Badassitude

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    Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
     
    #31 aFunnyFatGuy, Jan 23, 2013
  12. Sacridfire

    Sacridfire The Instigator

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    Oh come on. Let's get creative with these shall we?
     
    #32 Sacridfire, Jan 23, 2013
  13. Wolfs Bane

    Wolfs Bane New Member

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    The one time a Creeper blew up next to Chuck Norris, it was horrified to discover that it wasn't dead yet.
     
    #33 Wolfs Bane, Jan 23, 2013
  14. aFunnyFatGuy

    aFunnyFatGuy Badass with a Badassitude

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    The evil smasher glitch is nothing more than a chuck norris roundhouse kicked contained in a bullet.
     
    #34 aFunnyFatGuy, Jan 23, 2013
  15. moosemeat

    moosemeat Pandora's Woodland Beast

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    The Konami Code is only there to "De-Chuck Norris" Contra.......
     
    #35 moosemeat, Jan 23, 2013
  16. aFunnyFatGuy

    aFunnyFatGuy Badass with a Badassitude

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    Calling the moonshot is nothing more than a Chuck Norris leg drop from the moon.
     
    #36 aFunnyFatGuy, Feb 6, 2013
  17. Sacridfire

    Sacridfire The Instigator

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    The Warrior once died on Chuck Norris's loot. As a result the Eridians became extinct.
     
    #37 Sacridfire, Feb 6, 2013
  18. Murkface13

    Murkface13 V.I.P. Member

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    I remember in Afghanistan I was sitting in a stall taking a shit and I seen to my right on the wall, it said "Look Left". On the door in front of me, it said "Look Left", on the other wall, it said "Look Left". Behind me it said "You just got roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris" and someone else wrote under it "Dang, no one is getting out of this stall alive"
     
    #38 Murkface13, Feb 6, 2013
  19. moosemeat

    moosemeat Pandora's Woodland Beast

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    That is funny right there!

    Chuck Norris once shot a man...by pointing his finger and saying "BANG"...
     
    #39 moosemeat, Feb 6, 2013
  20. Murkface13

    Murkface13 V.I.P. Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    #40 Murkface13, Feb 6, 2013
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